1 SHAMASH.ORG /usr/www/wwwhc/listserv/archives/torch-d August 2001 1 162 27_Who did not make me a woman7_Barbara20_aimpe@compuserve.com31_Tue, 31 Jul 2001 11:09:41 -0400496_ISO-8859-1 Shoshana -

>>Do I understand correctly that you believe the true meaning of the bracha
is, that since it really is great to be a man rather than a woman, men are
thanking Hashem for the priviledge?<<

Well, I don't know what Dvora thinks, but this is pretty much what I
think.

None of what I am writing here is angry. I think you have to keep
in mind, the brachot were composed about 1900 years ago and
by people with mindset of 1900 years ago. [...]41_200107311109_MC3-DAED-E3F1@compuserve.com 164 31 31_Re: Who did not make me a woman15_Shoshana Sloman19_ssloman@hotmail.com30_Thu, 2 Aug 2001 16:01:26 -0500633_iso-8859-1 >So what I find bizarre is that rather than own up to what these
>brachot are, we go around trying to find more amenable
>interpretations of them rather than just acknowledging what
>they are, when they were composed, and the conventional wisdom
>of that time.

This is my question. If, indeed, that is the true meaning (Thanks, G-d, for
not making me a woman!), why would that not appear somewhere in the writings
of the rabbis, in discussing the meanings of the brachas? Especially since,
as you noted, people of prior times weren't concerned about being sensitive
with their remarks, [...]40_2Aug200116:01:26-0500ssloman@hotmail.com 196 111 31_Re: Who did not make me a woman15_Shoshana Sloman19_ssloman@hotmail.com30_Thu, 2 Aug 2001 16:10:27 -0500631_iso-8859-1 Some additional thoughts -

Even if it were the case that men are thanking Hashem each day for not being
made women, that would still be only the pshat understanding of the bracha,
and would not render all the other explanations of deeper meanings
irrelevant.

Regarding what you say about life before ATM's - you may be indicating that
you are from the generation prior to mine (I'm pushing 40), which seems to
have been rather difficult for women because the importance of women's
traditional roles had been minimized and they had not yet begun taking on
men's traditional roles. [...]40_2Aug200116:10:27-0500ssloman@hotmail.com 308 636 9_Re: Fears15_Shoshana Sloman19_ssloman@hotmail.com30_Thu, 2 Aug 2001 18:46:36 -0500625_iso-8859-1 Fears can be eliminated by introducing something that brings out a mutually
exclusive emotion - such as relaxation, amusement, or assertiveness. That's
why the method of helping the kid feel more powerful that was mentioned by
some can be useful. Also why children will often have some object (what T.
Berry Brazelton would call a "lovey") that gives them a feeling of security
when in fearful situations (like the teddy bears cops give out to kids they
help). Besides objects, thoughts can be used to elicit opposing emotions.
But kids tend to be more concrete, so even if you encourage [...]40_2Aug200118:46:36-0500ssloman@hotmail.com 945 1366 31_Re: Who did not make me a woman15_Shoshana Sloman19_ssloman@hotmail.com30_Sun, 5 Aug 2001 12:58:21 -0500576_iso-8859-1 Rachel Ann,

Thank you for what you wrote below. It occurred to me that many assertions
were made without any factual references to back them up. People may have
an idea that things were a certain way in ancient times, but that's not the
same as proof.

Also, I was thinking about the fact that in many times in history, with Jews
scattered in foreign countries, the goyim lived a much more comfortable life
than we did. Based on the idea that the bracha "who has not made me a
woman" is giving thanks for an easier, freer way of [...]40_5Aug200112:58:21-0500ssloman@hotmail.com 2312 67 56_Re: WHY Blessings on Women **IS** Part of Home Schooling15_Shoshana Sloman19_ssloman@hotmail.com31_Fri, 17 Aug 2001 15:31:26 -0500595_iso-8859-1 What you say below if right on the money. There are many online venues for
discussing this kind of issue and working out for yourself how to approach
it with your children. I don't want us to get bogged down debating an issue
that seems to be emotionally-charged for many of us, and that skates along
the line of debating the validity of oral Torah itself (which kind of debate
this list explicitly excludes). It's not that these are not valid
questions, it's that torch-d is not an appropriate forum for in-depth
analysis of them, and certainly not a place [...]41_17Aug200115:31:26-0500ssloman@hotmail.com 2380 3577 18_Re: Curing Grudges15_Shoshana Sloman19_ssloman@hotmail.com31_Fri, 17 Aug 2001 15:48:49 -0500521_iso-8859-1 I am familiar with the story you mention, and I like it. Thanks for
reminding me of it, as I think I can use to illustrate to my kids why they
need to cooperate as brothers, rather than trying to belittle or harm one
another.

Shoshana Sloman
torch-d listowner

----- Original Message -----
From: Russell Hendel
To: About religious Jewish home schooling
Sent: Monday, August 13, 2001 8:42 AM
Subject: RE: Curing Grudges [...]41_17Aug200115:48:49-0500ssloman@hotmail.com 5958 212 14_Re: Happy news15_Shoshana Sloman19_ssloman@hotmail.com31_Fri, 31 Aug 2001 10:32:38 -0500550_iso-8859-1 Re: Happy newsI like what you say here, Rivky. But if someone is suggesting you ask a shaila, the question for them may be which halacha they are concerned about. Do they think you are transgressing something by keeping him home? If so, what? Or, it could be that the person making the suggestion, and others who do ask shailas about these kinds of issues, want to check to be sure there is not a halacha of which they are unaware. Sometimes when people are very careful and always want to be sure they are within the bounds of Torah [...]41_31Aug200110:32:38-0500ssloman@hotmail.com 6171 92 24_Re: How to Ask a Shaiila15_Shoshana Sloman19_ssloman@hotmail.com31_Fri, 31 Aug 2001 14:49:50 -0500469_iso-8859-1 I agree with this completely. My observation is that often parents' well-meaning attempt to help their children succeed ends up robbing the children of the oppportunity to become self-reliant, which ironically becomes an obstacle to their success. As parents, we can, however, do things to motivate our children to take responsibility for themselves (as Susan Lapin described providing an incentive for such behavior), until it is an established habit. [...]41_31Aug200114:49:50-0500ssloman@hotmail.com 6264 110 43_How does a homeschooler change a lightbulb?15_Shoshana Sloman19_ssloman@hotmail.com31_Fri, 31 Aug 2001 15:31:11 -0500318_iso-8859-1 This was sent to me by a friend whose sister homeschools. When she was homeschooling only the first (before having four kids), her son described her as "part Mary Poppins, part Ms. Frizzle". She said this describes what her homeschool was like then:

How does a homeschooler change a light bulb? [...]41_31Aug200115:31:11-0500ssloman@hotmail.com