1 SHAMASH.ORG /usr/www/wwwhc/listserv/archives/torch-d January 2001 1 890 22_Re: TORCH-D digest 38015_Shoshana Socher24_shoshanasocher@yahoo.com36_Mon, 1 Jan 2001 09:33:05 -0800 (PST)1111_us-ascii Hi--any homeschooling contacts in the Los Angeles
area?

Thanks in advance,

Shoshana Socher

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by m4.jersey.juno.com (queuemail) id FSQRVFZH; [...]49_20010101173305.61917.qmail@web9403.mail.yahoo.com 892 681 55_Re: What do you think about this? long but please read.15_Shoshana Sloman19_ssloman@hotmail.com25_Wed, 10 Jan 2001 14:03:06608_- Rivky,

I really feel for you and your daughter dealing with her anxiety problem.
My degree is in counseling psych, and my specialty is behavior therapy. I
do think your daughter needs the help of a professional, but someone who is
specifically trained to deal with anxiety disorders. As horribly painful as
they are to experience, they are 100% curable. Try to find a therapist who
specializes in this problem - ask around, look online, call local hospital
or university. As wonderful as homeschooling can be, for a variety of
reasons, it will not resolve a social phobia. [...]36_10Jan200114:03:06ssloman@hotmail.com 1574 786 55_Re: What do you think about this? long but please read.15_Shoshana Sloman19_ssloman@hotmail.com31_Thu, 11 Jan 2001 12:39:38 -0500485_iso-8859-1 Several people have noted that forcing a child (or anyone) into an anxiety-provoking situation does not cure their fear. I just want to add my agreement to that. But plain avoiding such situations does not eliminate fear, either.

Obviously the details of the situation need to be investigated (in what specific situations the problem occurs, whether there are precipitating events, etc.), and that is the first thing that a properly trained therapist should do. [...]41_11Jan200112:39:38-0500ssloman@hotmail.com 2361 418 60_Re: Rivkis daughter::REsonses to Susan|Rena|Francine|Shoshna15_Shoshana Sloman19_ssloman@hotmail.com31_Mon, 15 Jan 2001 12:55:20 -0500554_iso-8859-1 > And at this point I must disagree with Shoshana. If your daughter is
> being abused in any way then it would be criminal to FORCE her to go to
> school.

Russell, on this issue you are in no way disagreeing with me, since I never
said she should be forced to go into a terrifying situation. There has not
even been a hint that there is an actual abusive situation going on (Rivky
said that her daughter feels uncomfortable, not that the girls are doing
anything bad to her). It could be that there is a rational [...]41_15Jan200112:55:20-0500ssloman@hotmail.com 2780 33 31_NY Jewish Homeschooling Article13_Barbara Mazor20_aimpe@compuserve.com31_Mon, 15 Jan 2001 15:59:45 -0500438_ISO-8859-1 Hi everyone -

I posted this at the other list, but I know not everyone is
in both places.

There is a very nice article about Rachel Anolick
in our local Jewish weekly.

Here is the link:

www.thejewishweek.com/bottom/specialcontent.php3?artid=87

Rachel, I am so proud of you for doing this interview! I
would have been mortified to have someone come to
my home! Great job. [...]42_15Jan200115:59:45-0500aimpe@compuserve.com 2814 58 32_4yo - to school or not to school13_Barbara Mazor20_aimpe@compuserve.com31_Mon, 15 Jan 2001 16:02:34 -0500537_ISO-8859-1 Dvorah and Alex -

>>We have a situation here where my daughter is now requesting to go to
school. She is only 4 years old and is one of the key elements in our newly
formed support group.<<

This is a tough one. Especially because kindergarten can be so
appealing with all those toys. It can even be damaging if it is pro-
moting academic skills for which your child is not ready. E.g. writing
and copying from boards (This is a very popular pre-literacy activity
here in modern Brooklyn). [...]42_15Jan200116:02:34-0500aimpe@compuserve.com 2873 526 35_Re: NY Jewish Homeschooling Article15_Shoshana Sloman19_ssloman@hotmail.com31_Mon, 15 Jan 2001 17:03:05 -0500527_iso-8859-1 I just read the article - very nice.

Shoshana Sloman
torch-d listowner

----- Original Message -----
From: Barbara Mazor
To: About religious Jewish home schooling
Sent: Monday, January 15, 2001 3:59 PM
Subject: NY Jewish Homeschooling Article

Hi everyone -

I posted this at the other list, but I know not everyone is
in both places.

There is a very nice article about Rachel Anolick
in our local Jewish weekly. [...]41_15Jan200117:03:05-0500ssloman@hotmail.com 3400 129 31_NY Jewish Homeschooling Article13_Barbara Mazor20_aimpe@compuserve.com31_Wed, 17 Jan 2001 00:40:10 -0500557_ISO-8859-1 Francine -

>>The article is great. I loved it. One problem with the website where it
is posted is that there are other links underneath it. I found none of
those links take me to the articles they are supposed to but rather to
other articles. Anyone else have this problem?<<

I couldn't get the links to work either. You can try getting to the
articles using their search feature. My mother-in-law actually
gave me the hard copy of the newspaper. If you are so
interested, I could drop it in the mail to you. [...]42_17Jan200100:40:10-0500aimpe@compuserve.com 3530 43 32_4yo - to school or not to school13_Barbara Mazor20_aimpe@compuserve.com31_Wed, 17 Jan 2001 00:50:33 -0500585_ISO-8859-1 Alex -

>>I didn't stress the main point. Our daughter has only 3
people (all boys) to socialize with during our support group session. I
don't think this is too bad. But my wife says otherwise.<<

No, you didn't stress the MAIN point. This is not much of
a mystery, is it?

Well, 2 pieces of advice. First of all, always listen to your wife .
Ok, seriously, speaking as a wife and a mother of boys, here's
what I've noticed. Little girls do seem to be more attached to
their girl friends and play more socially with them than [...]42_17Jan200100:50:33-0500aimpe@compuserve.com 3574 551 32_4yo - to school or not to school13_Barbara Mazor20_aimpe@compuserve.com31_Wed, 17 Jan 2001 14:02:10 -0500931_ISO-8859-1 Alex -

This morning at breakfast I told my dh about your
situation and my response.

He said, tell Alex: ALWAYS listen to your wife. ;-)

Barbara

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Date: [...]42_17Jan200114:02:10-0500aimpe@compuserve.com 4126 1530 54_Re: Responses to Rena:Francine:Barbara:Shifra:Shoshana15_Shoshana Sloman19_ssloman@hotmail.com31_Tue, 23 Jan 2001 08:01:38 -0500445_iso-8859-1 > Finally let me end on a less serious note--the disagreement between
> me and Shoshana. If a person hasnt been eating my first response
> would be to send them to a supermarket not a psychologist. If they
> went, bought food and ate then I wouldnt care why they werent eating
> before. If they however dont feel hungry I still would not send them
> to a psychologist. I would send them to a doctor for a checkup. [...]41_23Jan200108:01:38-0500ssloman@hotmail.com 5657 94 55_Re: What do you think about this? long but please read.15_Shoshana Sloman19_ssloman@hotmail.com31_Wed, 24 Jan 2001 10:29:19 -0500595_iso-8859-1 Dear Rivky,

>From what you've said here and in other responses, it does seem to be mostly
a social anxiety thing, not a problem of the school or kids treating her
badly (and I am inclined to believe that you and your daughter are the best
judges of that). I think I understand your hesitancy about psychologists.
That is why I am suggesting you locate someone who is specifically trained
to deal with this kind of problem - so you can avoid wasting your money or
potentially harming your daughter (G-d forbid) by going to someone with no
expertise in [...]41_24Jan200110:29:19-0500ssloman@hotmail.com 5752 1334 46_Re: 4 Year old dilemna--Answers to Dvorah/Alex15_Shoshana Sloman19_ssloman@hotmail.com31_Wed, 24 Jan 2001 10:32:57 -0500547_iso-8859-1 > > The answer is that there are two requirements in learning: One
> > is to learn--the other is to belong to a learning community. For
> > example even though his grandfather taught him Talmud nevertheless
> > the Rav went to school like everyone else as a young child since it
> > was important to have a peer group.
> >
> I disagree with this emphatically, considering what peer groups are
> made up of these days, and the societal mores most are under, the
> damage this can do, the lack of morals, the [...]41_24Jan200110:32:57-0500ssloman@hotmail.com 7087 80 8_Michigan13_Barbara Mazor20_aimpe@compuserve.com31_Sun, 28 Jan 2001 17:47:17 -05001049_ISO-8859-1 Rivky -

Are you in the Detroit area?

We may be in Southfield for Pesach.

Barbara

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From:
To: "About religious [...]42_28Jan200117:47:17-0500aimpe@compuserve.com 7168 28 51_What do you think about this? long but please read.13_Barbara Mazor20_aimpe@compuserve.com31_Mon, 29 Jan 2001 01:11:09 -0500418_ISO-8859-1 Rivky -

>>Maybe i can invite someone to speak from Clonlara
homeschooling organization here in Michigan. You know, a sign that says "If
you are homeschooling, or just thinking of homeschooling....come join us
for..." or start a homeschooling support group? Oh the crazy ideas i get
when i am tired.<<

This doesn't sound so crazy. Put signs in the library and in the
shuls. [...]42_29Jan200101:11:09-0500aimpe@compuserve.com 7197 3211 10_other kids13_Barbara Mazor20_aimpe@compuserve.com31_Mon, 29 Jan 2001 01:11:05 -0500941_ISO-8859-1 Everybody:

So, since we are all so chatty lately.....

I am curious what are your feelings and attitudes regarding socializing
with other homeschoolers (or schoolers for that matter) who are
either not Jewish or not religious.

What is your philosophy and why? What has your experience
been?

Barbara

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