1 SHAMASH.ORG /usr/www/wwwhc/listserv/archives/scj-parenting August 1996 2 1526 67_soc.culture.jewish.parenting FAQ: Newsgroup Policies and Procedures13_Daniel Faigin21_faigin@pacificnet.net26_30 Jul 1996 11:08:00 -0700785_- Archive-name: judaism/FAQ/scjp-admin Soc-culture-jewish-archive-name: faq.scjp-admin Posting-Frequency: Monthly

Frequently Asked Questions on Soc.Culture.Jewish.Parenting Newsgroup Policies and Procedures [Last Change: $Date: 1996/05/31 18:08:49 $ $Revision: 1.24 $] [Last Post: Sun Jun 30 11:07:10 US/Pacific 1996]

This posting is a summary of the purpose and policies of the moderated newsgroup soc.culture.jewish.parenting (and the equivalent gatewayed mailing list). It does not answer questions about Judaism itself; the soc.culture.jewish FAQs and Reading Lists should be consulted for that purpose. It also does not answer general childrearing questions; the various misc.kids FAQs (posted regularly to misc.kids.info) should be consulted for that purpose. [...] 1529 30 29_Call for creative seder ideas13_Mel Silberman19_mel@tigger.jvnc.net29_Wed, 31 Jul 1996 13:37:23 GMT321_-

Shalom,

I am Shoshana Silberman, compiler of "A Family Haggadah" (Karben) , a widely sold haggadah for families with young children. I am in the process of compiling "A Family Haggadah 2" and would like to learn about any creative things you do in your family seder to mention in this new haggadah. [...] 1560 33 17_Going to services11_Kris Hasson19_hasson@teleport.com28_Thu, 1 Aug 1996 14:00:51 GMT345_- I really enjoy going to Friday night services. Unfortunately, my sons don't. They are 6 and 10 and they just spend the time in the daycare playing.

I just started going to services occasionally this spring, so it's a new thing for them. Also, they are with their father on alternate weekends and he does not take them to services. [...] 1594 84 31_Twinning Projects' Survey (fwd)16_Dov Winner (mft)24_dovw@mofet.macam98.ac.il29_Wed, 31 Jul 1996 10:54:13 GMT538_US-ASCII ---------- Forwarded message ---------- Date: Wed, 31 Jul 1996 00:01:58 +0300 From: Dov Winer Reply-To: JEWISHNT - Jewish Global Information Network To: Multiple recipients of list JEWISHNT Subject: Twinning Projects' Survey

Shalom,

Several Twinning projects that make use of CMC (Computer Mediated Communications) have been initiated by Jewish schools, community centers, clubs, synagogues, youth movements and other institutions. [...] 1679 46 21_Erev shabbat and kids16_Michael Herzbrun17_herzbrun@sjfc.edu28_Fri, 2 Aug 1996 12:50:31 GMT583_US-ASCII

In answer to Kris, Great question. You are doing just fine (IMO). From my personal experience as well as from the research I have done, "forcing" kids to sit through a service is among the least effective things a parent can do to promote a good feeling about Judaism. It is crucial that the kids see what is important to 'you,' and that your religious feelings are consistent with what you do personally (hypocrisy leaves a lasting impression on children); it is also important that they at least come along with you (i.e., that you be together on Shabbat) -- [...] 1726 41 21_Re: Going to services15_Richard A. Ifft20_raifft@ix.netcom.com28_Fri, 2 Aug 1996 15:29:10 GMT553_-

I started taking my daughter to Friday night services (since they were shorter than Saturday morning services) when she was about 4. When we started, I let her bring some picture books. She has always had the ability to sit still and read for a long time, so she just read quietly and didn't disturb anyone. Little by little, I had her listen to parts of the service and start reading her book a little later in the evening. As she got more familiar with the service, she started enjoying it more, and reading her book less. She's 9 now, [...] 1768 50 21_Re: Going to services10_neil baker17_bakern@dbisna.com28_Thu, 1 Aug 1996 17:50:33 GMT368_us-ascii Kris Hasson wrote: > > I really enjoy going to Friday night services. Unfortunately, my sons don't. I have always beleived that when children grow up feeling comfortable in the synogog, they will continue to go to the synogog.

I think your approach has great merit and i agree with your reservations against forcing them to remain at the service. [...] 1819 47 30_fund raising & nursery schools0_18_LayneMurph@aol.com29_Wed, 24 Jul 1996 21:39:45 GMT608_- My little boy attends a nursery school at a Jewish Community Center in a very ethnically diverse section of Los Angeles. There are many non-Jewish students in the school and the brunt of the Jewish families are not observant. Our family represents the most religious end of the spectrum however we are delighted with the administration of the school and the amount of Jewish content incorporated into the nursery school programs. I am also pleased that while practically none of the families keep kosher homes there is a Kashrut policy that is enforced. As with all community based programs, finances [...] 1867 30 41_Re: SCJ-PARENTING digest 265--tikkun olam0_16_JRomjrom@aol.com29_Wed, 24 Jul 1996 02:19:46 GMT518_-

In a message dated 96-07-23 00:07:25 EDT, you write:

>From: Meredith_Warshaw@frankston.com >Subject: Re: Tikkun Olam >Message-ID: <199607210134.AA18640@world.std.com> > >In the town I used to live in, all the supermarkets had donation boxes at >the exit for the local soup kitchen. It worked very well and was a very >concrete way to teach tikkun olam. Every time we went shopping, I'd >have Keith help me pick out an item to buy for the box, and he always >got to put it in. I really miss this. [...] 1898 74 34_Re: Family Sukkot in the hospital?13_Sharon Matten16_kipah@tezcat.com28_Thu, 1 Aug 1996 19:42:00 GMT291_- Hi, as someone who has "been there, done that" (my middle son was born erev sukkot) I was very blessed to have a lot of family near my house. I actually was so tired that when I ended up staying in the hospital with the baby for the first days of sukkot it didn't bother me at all... [...] 1973 77 21_Re: Going to services14_Ken Scheinblum22_AlterEgo@ix.netcom.com28_Fri, 2 Aug 1996 13:40:12 GMT469_- Kris,

You are not going to like this answer.

We, as Jewish parents, must set expectations. I expect my children to attend services with me. That means going to services is not play time. Your kids are old enough to sit through a Friday night service.

The key is to get them to participate, not just sit there. Even if it is only through osmosis, they will start to learn the melodies and prayers. They will become familiar with the rituals. [...] 2051 31 11_arts/crafts5_Maled15_gjmmmc@qnis.net28_Fri, 2 Aug 1996 10:53:41 GMT572_us-ascii

Ii Note: I posted a similar message to torch-ch, so, for those of you who read both, please forgive. I'm wondering if anyone can give some suggestions regarding arts and crafts. As k'tanim director I am always searching for ideas, especially with a Jewish flavor. I try to have a craft consistant with the weekly Parsha, whenever possible. I'm not creative in the area of arts and crafts but can at least copy other's ideas :) One of my challenges is that the age span of the children in the program range from newly turned 3 year olds through third [...] 2083 42 34_Re: fund raising & nursery schools19_Shoshana L. Boublil30_toramada@mail.netvision.net.il28_Sun, 4 Aug 1996 00:44:06 GMT316_- On Wed, 24 Jul 1996 14:39:45 -0700, you wrote: > I'd love to do passover cookies >but I just don't think this would fly. I adore school and I feel reluctant >about trying to quelch the wrapping paper project unless I have a good >alternative to propose. Any ideas for a potentially lucrative sales >campaign? [...] 2126 41 28_Re: SCJ-PARENTING digest 2740_16_JRomjrom@aol.com28_Sun, 4 Aug 1996 14:08:34 GMT604_-

In a message dated 96-08-03 00:05:24 EDT, you write:

>The key is to get them to participate, not just sit there. Even if it >is only through osmosis, they will start to learn the melodies and >prayers. They will become familiar with the rituals. > >Have a little backbone. Letting them play away from the service does >nothing to teach them about Judaism. Make it clear they will attend >services. Period. No options. I think you'll have a better shot at >imprinting a positive notion of Jewishness with this approach. Forget >this false "resentment" issue. Would you have the same [...] 2168 36 29_Call for creative seder ideas14_world mizrachi24_mizrachi@netmedia.net.il28_Mon, 5 Aug 1996 06:44:19 GMT563_us-ascii

We've found that the long wait between the start of the Seder and the meal can be too long for little kids (under bar or bat mitzva), making them lose interest, fall asleep, complain loud and long of acute hunger and/or run wild because of boredom.

To overcome this we have a "Question Plate" at our Seder table. The Question Plate at our house is filled with nut meats and berries (which my kids love). Every time a kid either asks a good question or has the answer to a question the kid is rewarded with something from the Question [...] 2205 26 33_Re: Call for creative seder ideas14_Andrea Herrera15_andreah@utj.org28_Mon, 5 Aug 1996 12:28:31 GMT466_- Our friends came up with an interesting idea to keep their small children happy and (semi) quiet :-) during the seder. She made little hand puppets (you could do popscicle stick ones too) of all the "players" in the seder. The kids would then act out the different parts of the seder as the Haggadah was being read. She said it worked beautifully, the kids enjoyed it and best of all, made it through the entire seder. (They had to listen for their "parts".) [...] 2232 28 27_Re: Meaningful Girl's Names14_Shirah Winicur27_swinicur@psych.colorado.edu28_Mon, 5 Aug 1996 15:45:29 GMT215_- In article <4tl1h5$p04@newsbf02.news.aol.com>, pixellle@aol.com (Pixellle) wrote:

> Shira = strong

Actually, Shirah means "singing" or "poetry." (Same root as shir, which means song or poem.)

2261 51 28_Re: SCJ-PARENTING digest 27416_Michael Herzbrun17_herzbrun@sjfc.edu28_Sat, 3 Aug 1996 15:42:56 GMT639_US-ASCII

Ken Scheinblum presents a good case for parents insisting that their kids sit with them during Shabbat services. (I read his argument after submitting mine in support of Kris' approach.) Ken draws the analogy to school, implying that as parents we certainly don't allow our kids to sit outside the classroom... I have considered that same metaphor before in comparing secular school to religious school education. However I am not convinced that it applies as well to Shabbat services -- except in those situations in which the attending congregation includes a significant number of other kids. In other words, just [...] 2313 73 21_Re: Going to services9_K Goldman20_kgold@watson.ibm.com28_Mon, 5 Aug 1996 14:43:41 GMT531_- hasson@teleport.com (Kris Hasson) writes: |> I really enjoy going to Friday night services. Unfortunately, my sons |> don't. They are 6 and 10 and they just spend the time in the daycare |> playing. |> |> I just started going to services occasionally this spring, so it's a |> new thing for them. Also, they are with their father on alternate |> weekends and he does not take them to services. |> |> Is it enough that they see how going to services affects me? That I |> enjoy it and it makes a difference in my life? |> |> [...] 2387 50 22_New Yeshiva in Toronto15_Georganne Burke19_nbcnet@inforamp.net28_Sun, 4 Aug 1996 03:17:24 GMT617_- We are proud to anounce the opening of a new Yeshiva here in Toronto, called Yeshivas Ahavas Torah. Rabbi Shmuel Yosef Zirkind will be the Menahel.

The goals of the Yeshiva are to 1) develop a responsiveness to the dynamic process of lifelong Torah learning; 2) develop resourcefulness, adaptability and creativity in learning and living; 3) develop a feeling of self-worth; 4) develop a sense of Torah responsibility for the quality of Jewish life at the local, national and international level; and 5) acquire skills and attitudes that will lead to satisfaction and productivity in the world of work. [...] 2438 60 34_Re: fund raising & nursery schools13_Louise Miller22_miller@louise.ucsd.edu28_Mon, 5 Aug 1996 18:06:50 GMT557_us-ascii One year our school made up with a local party rental place to rent sukkahs. They would deliver and put up a nice sized canvas and metal sukkah in the yard, and then come get it. Not cheap, but very convenient!

Another less ambitious idea that our local Bnei Avika does is sell schach for Sukkot. Unless you live in a rural area, it's not easy to find a legal (and non-injurious to trees) source. (Just don't sell the bamboo mats! Although they make perfectly good schach, first of all you have to buy them to resell, and besides since [...] 2499 50 24_re: wrapping paper sales10_Marc Davis15_mdavis@infi.net28_Sat, 3 Aug 1996 14:45:25 GMT397_US-ASCII

As a parent of children who attend a jewish day school, I can tell you there is very little that will fly in the way of a sales campaign.

I work in a secular school that also sells wrapping paper, but they also have annual plant sales in the spring and magazine sales. That sort of thing goes over better than something overtly religious, whether christian or jewish. [...] 2550 54 15_Re: arts/crafts9_K Goldman20_kgold@watson.ibm.com28_Mon, 5 Aug 1996 21:36:48 GMT552_- gjmmmc@qnis.net (Maled) writes: |> |> I'm wondering if anyone can give some suggestions regarding arts and |> crafts. As k'tanim director I am always searching for ideas, especially |> with a Jewish flavor. I try to have a craft consistent with the weekly |> Parsha, whenever possible. I'm not creative in the area of arts and |> crafts but can at least copy other's ideas :) One of my challenges is |> that the age span of the children in the program range from newly |> turned 3 year olds through third grade. Thanks for any help you might |> [...] 2605 23 18_fund-raising ideas11_Marsha Rapp19_marsha@inter.net.il28_Tue, 6 Aug 1996 14:23:14 GMT465_us-ascii My daughter's school has a yearly 7-week sfira read-a-thon during the sfira. YOu sign up sponsors for X amount per book read, and then start reading. It encourages reading and here the money is used to outfit the school library. Marsha Marsha@inter.net.il



* This post reflects the author's opinion; the moderators' opinions may differ. * Posters seeking medical or halachic information should consult competent * authorities in those fields. 2629 85 24_Kids Sitting in Services14_Andrea Herrera15_andreah@utj.org28_Tue, 6 Aug 1996 06:16:25 GMT414_-

I think I may take a minority view here, but here goes :-)

I always (and have continue to) expected my children to sit with us during services. Whether it be Friday night or Saturday or holiday. I have managed to raise four children who can do so.

I believe that a lot of this has to do with a) the parent's attitude, b) what is expected of a child and c) coming to services prepared. [...] 2715 34 28_CTTS - 2 yrs - Going to shul0_23_sgs@mini.skynet.att.com28_Mon, 5 Aug 1996 17:56:37 GMT495_- Up until now my son Moshe's only exposure to shul has been my taking him in just as its ending, but he's beginning to understand when I tell him he needs to be quiet so I thought I'd give a try to taking him in for a few minutes.

So, before we go in I tell him "Now we have to be shh, quiet!" He repeats "Quiet" - this seems promising so we slip in, towards the end of the Rabbi's speech. I go in, sit down and Moshe realizes that most everyone is nice and quiet, but there's this [...] 2750 41 24_Passover Plague Grab Bag15_Irene Bleiweiss16_IBLEIWEI@fcc.gov28_Tue, 6 Aug 1996 18:58:21 GMT392_- In response to the question on creative Passover ideas ... We do different sections of the seder from different haggadot (using the parts that we like best from each) and we also add our own ideas. We really like the Passover story portion of the Family Haggadah written by the original questioner but it didn't mention each of the plagues. So this year I created a "Plague Grab Bag." [...] 2792 69 34_Re: fund raising & nursery schools14_Janet Deneroff22_deneroff@ix.netcom.com28_Tue, 6 Aug 1996 15:58:46 GMT594_- In <4u5d7q$gu@poisson.nosc.mil> Louise Miller writes: > >One year our school made up with a local party rental place to >rent sukkahs. They would deliver and put up a nice sized canvas >and metal sukkah in the yard, and then come get it. Not cheap, >but very convenient! > >Another less ambitious idea that our local Bnei Avika does >is sell schach for Sukkot. Unless you live in a rural area, it's >not easy to find a legal (and non-injurious to trees) source. (Just >don't sell the bamboo mats! Although they make perfectly good >schach, first of all you have [...] 2862 50 28_Re: SCJ-PARENTING digest 27816_Richard Schachet20_lvrabbi@accessnv.com28_Wed, 7 Aug 1996 21:23:35 GMT587_-

Andrea Herrera writes regarding children's behavior in shul. Her posting should be sent to all magazines of the various movements in Judaism because she is so right on.

One of the major arguments we have had in our congregation (70% are seniors) is regarding the conduct of children at services. We had parents who stated when their children misbehaved, "That's the way kids are." I say NO! That's the way ill behaved children are. As Andrea's children sit at services, so did mine. They knew what was expected of them because it started when they were very young. [...] 2913 51 21_Re: Going to services14_Laurel Halbany23_mythago@agora.rdrop.com28_Thu, 8 Aug 1996 02:19:48 GMT432_- AlterEgo@ix.netcom.com (Ken Scheinblum) wrote:

>Have a little backbone. Letting them play away from the service does >nothing to teach them about Judaism. Make it clear they will attend >services. Period. No options. I think you'll have a better shot at >imprinting a positive notion of Jewishness with this approach. Forget >this false "resentment" issue. Would you have the same opinion if the >subject were school? [...] 2965 42 12_Re: Services10_UBAHLANSKY18_ubahlansky@aol.com28_Wed, 7 Aug 1996 08:34:27 GMT440_- I would love to be able to attend services regularly however the synagogue(s) where we attend don't like to hear "children" sounds. The people at the orthodox shul turn and make shushing sounds AND come up and say things like, "you know there is day care downstairs!"

Come on, I'm not talking about loud disruptive behavior I'm talking about things like a child saying, "Hey Mom, there's the Torah, I want to give it a kiss." [...] 3008 24 15_Re: arts/crafts4_Skc312_skc3@aol.com28_Thu, 8 Aug 1996 03:48:01 GMT447_- In reply to your search for crafts for 3-10 year olds. We made a Tzedakah can very simply that all the kids could do. We took an empty coffee can & covered it with construction paper. Then we glued religious sabbath symbols I had cut out such as Stars of David, wineglasses, etc. onto the paper. Finally, we cut a slit in the lid for the coin slot. My 3 year old is really excited to put coins in every week into her very own Tzedakah can! [...] 3033 45 20_Re: About Acceptance16_Mitchell Bruntel16_mbruntel@att.com28_Thu, 8 Aug 1996 15:44:26 GMT296_us-ascii When we adopted our son 2 years ago, we tried DESPERATELY to find an orthodox rabbi or community to convert him. (we're conservadox i guess). No luck... Even though we're shomer shabos and quite committed, we couldnt find one who could help. SO we had our conservative rabbi do it. [...] 3079 35 16_Behavior in Shul11_Marsha Rapp19_marsha@inter.net.il28_Thu, 8 Aug 1996 14:54:43 GMT563_us-ascii I also agree with Andrea about children's behavior in Shul. When my children were at the age where they weren't nursing anymore, my husband would take them with him to shul (about at age 6 months) and have them in the stroller while he davened, they got attention, and at the same time, learned to sit quietly. My elder son would look forward to going to shul with his father and at the minyan where my husband goes (at the Me'arat HaMachpela in Hevron) which is a "eastern" sephardi minyan (i.e. not plain sefardi but from Arab countries more) and [...] 3115 36 12_Kids in Shul15_Irene Bleiweiss16_IBLEIWEI@fcc.gov28_Fri, 9 Aug 1996 13:25:11 GMT552_- I had a shul experience similar to D'vorah's when my daughter was 3. We went to a temple that had family services once a month, which we enjoyed very much. I was planning to join but wanted also to see what the temple was like at other times because I didn't consider temple a once-a-month sort of experience. After lighting Shabbat candles at home one Friday, we went to a regular non-family service and my daughter said something like "Look, they light candles here too." As a result we were asked to leave the premises. I don't mean asked to [...] 3152 76 21_Re: Going to services14_Paul Hossfield27_PHossfield@news-e2c.gnn.com28_Fri, 9 Aug 1996 03:10:52 GMT551_us-ascii I really enjoy going to Friday night services. Unfortunately, my sons don't. ->They are 6 and 10 and they just spend the time in the daycare ->playing. -> ->I just started going to services occasionally this spring, so ->it's a new thing ->for them. Also, they are with their father on alternate weekends ->and he does ->not take them to services. -> ->Is it enough that they see how going to services affects me? ->That I enjoy it ->and it makes a difference in my life? -> ->I also tell them verbally that it is important to me. And I [...] 3229 85 13_Moral Dilemma15_Marjorie Peskin24_mpeskin@lynx.dac.neu.edu28_Fri, 9 Aug 1996 16:58:24 GMT272_US-ASCII This is a problem I've been dealing with for a few months now. I'll tell you the problem. I'll tell you what I've done so far, and I'm interested to know what you would do in a similar circumstance, and if there are any other solutions I haven't thought of. [...] 3315 34 33_Really young children and shul...21_Rachelle J. Bienstock29_rachelle@picard.niehs.nih.gov28_Thu, 8 Aug 1996 20:19:39 GMT514_us-ascii Following the line of kids sitting in services...

What do people do with really small children? My daughter is 18 months old...it is almost impossible for her to sit still for any length of time, so as a result, one of us, my husband or I have had to watch our daughter and one of us can go to services. We can not even leave her in daycare if it is provided as she is even too little to be left with someone she doesn't know (she will just cry and scream if left with an unknown babysitter). [...] 3350 65 21_Re: Going to services11_Kris Hasson19_hasson@teleport.com29_Sat, 10 Aug 1996 14:58:38 GMT670_- In article <32020211.3506560@smtp.ix.netcom.com>, AlterEgo@ix.netcom.com (Ken Scheinblum) wrote: >Kris, > >You are not going to like this answer.

Actually, Ken, I was not at all offended. I've been thinking about your message for a while, which I hope explains the delayed response.



>Have a little backbone. Letting them play away from the service does >nothing to teach them about Judaism. Make it clear they will attend >services. Period. No options. I think you'll have a better shot at >imprinting a positive notion of Jewishness with this approach. Forget >this false "resentment" issue. Would you have the same opinion if the >subject [...] 3416 84 37_Re: Really young children and shul...15_Marjorie Peskin24_mpeskin@lynx.dac.neu.edu29_Sat, 10 Aug 1996 03:20:15 GMT525_- Rachelle J. Bienstock (rachelle@picard.niehs.nih.gov) wrote: : Following the line of kids sitting in services...

: What do people do with really small children? My daughter is : 18 months old...it is almost impossible for her to sit still : for any length of time, so as a result, one of us, my husband or I : have had to watch our daughter and one of us can go to services. : We can not even leave her in daycare if it is provided as she is even : too little to be left with someone she doesn't know (she will [...] 3501 84 17_Re: Moral Dilemma15_Georganne Burke19_nbcnet@inforamp.net29_Sun, 11 Aug 1996 02:21:40 GMT356_- I am shocked that in this day and age an organization can get away with such a blatantly bigoted action. I would recommend that you immediately report this to their national organization and that you indicate to the members of the organization that because of your religious beliefs and the intransigence of the organization you may have to resign. [...] 3586 73 16_Re: Kids in Shul13_Suzanna Hicks16_afn06474@afn.org29_Sat, 10 Aug 1996 13:01:10 GMT594_US-ASCII Following this interesting thread I'd like to make a brief introduction and ask a question intended mainly for private responses.

I am converting to Judaism but am very much in the initial phase. This new year will be dedicated to learning -- I am committed to learning Hebrew (enrolling in a class at the U. of Florida) and attending an overview of Judaism course taught by a local conservative rabbi. My sons are 1 and 6 and the eldest has had a decidedly Christian education/indoctrination thus far and "talking" with him, myself, goes only so far. He is quite confused [...] 3660 36 17_Re: Moral Dilemma18_Thomas A Longstaff20_tl2b+@andrew.cmu.edu29_Sun, 11 Aug 1996 13:13:55 GMT536_- Marjorie,

I am shocked to hear this. I am offended that there is an organization for childen especially, that is so discriminatory in their practice. I think you should write or call the National Organization. Also call the other local ones and find out what there policy is. Also call JDL and see if they have any info. I have a few friends that belong to twins clubs. I will ask them how they would react. If you have the time and ability I would fight this. If not don't feel like you are giving up, you aren't you are [...] 3697 71 19_young children/shul5_Maled15_gjmmmc@qnis.net29_Sun, 11 Aug 1996 22:56:09 GMT601_us-ascii

I'll add by $.02 to the subject of children at services. I am the director of the k'tanim progeam at our synagogue. I take this responsibility very seriously, for I believe that childrens' early "education" usually sets the tone, for better or worse, for further participation as they grow older. Although I know some would disagree with me, and that's fine (of course), I feel it is very difficult for very young children to sit quietly and still for the service. The vocabulary, alone, is often way behind young childrens' abilities to understand. OTOH, I feel that I would be [...] 3769 58 19_Little ones in shul14_Hadass Eviatar26_eviatar@noether.ibd.nrc.ca29_Mon, 12 Aug 1996 15:08:33 GMT489_us-ascii Rachelle wrote: > > Following the line of kids sitting in services... > > What do people do with really small children? My daughter is > 18 months old...it is almost impossible for her to sit still > for any length of time, so as a result, one of us, my husband or I > have had to watch our daughter and one of us can go to services. > We can not even leave her in daycare if it is provided as she is even > too little to be left with someone she doesn't know (she will just [...] 3828 47 19_Shul for youngsters10_Marc Davis15_mdavis@infi.net29_Sat, 10 Aug 1996 15:18:54 GMT395_US-ASCII

I have been reading this thread and am very interested in it. In my case, my children go to a jewish day school and know more than I do. I taught myself some songs and parts of the friday night services and the kids enjoy watching me and telling me if I make mistakes in melodies, etc. We began with friday night servies and some saturday servies, but come in a bit later. [...] 3876 48 17_Re: Moral Dilemma0_24_root@nntpa.cb.lucent.com29_Mon, 12 Aug 1996 19:05:23 GMT398_us-ascii Georganne Burke wrote: > > I am shocked that in this day and age an organization can get away with > such a blatantly bigoted action. I would recommend that you immediately > report this to their national organization and that you indicate to the > members of the organization that because of your religious beliefs and > the intransigence of the organization you may have to resign. [...] 3925 60 41_Kashrut and the JCC (and my son) - A Vent13_Louise Miller22_miller@louise.ucsd.edu29_Mon, 12 Aug 1996 20:04:27 GMT422_us-ascii Last Friday I went to pick my son up at the JCC camp, and he was happily munching away at non-kosher doughtnuts, despite the repeated assurances from the staff that he was being fed only kosher food. (His lunch box full of healthy and kosher goodies sat untouched.)

He's only 2.5, and not mature enough to question what he's been fed and to give up something yummy that all the other kids are eating. [...] 3986 45 37_Re: Really young children and shul...12_Micha Berger21_aishdas@haven.ios.com29_Mon, 12 Aug 1996 12:06:02 GMT340_- Rachelle J. Bienstock (rachelle@picard.niehs.nih.gov) wrote: : What do people do with children this age? I don't go to services to : sit outside the sanctuary and gab like zillions of other people do : with their small children...

As an O, I often find myself defending the non-egalitarianism of O -- particularly on the net. [...] 4032 46 17_CTTD during shema18_Steven R Weintraub19_stevenw@pswtech.com29_Mon, 12 Aug 1996 23:57:47 GMT579_US-ASCII

To explain this I need to give some background. Every night when Shoshana (3.5 yrs) goes to bed, we sing Shema and V'ahavta. I've come up with hand signals for her to help her learn the words and their meaning (like for l'vavecha we thump our chest).

This last Shabbat as we sat in services the Shema is recited and there she is happily doing the hand signals. I turn around and several people are staring. I feel something between pride and embarassment, especially later during the Oneg someone asked me what she was doing and I had to demonstrate [...] 4079 57 12_moral dilema5_Maled15_gjmmmc@qnis.net29_Tue, 13 Aug 1996 09:37:14 GMT564_us-ascii For Suzanna, a potential convert, who faces a moral dilema with her young children- I am sure that the situation you describe is most frustrating and difficult. May I make a few suggestions? First, try to get involved with temple life. The sooner your children, especially the six year old, make friendships, it will help them not only feel part of the group, but will build their Jewish identities, too. I'm glad that you have spoken with a rabbi. I would be willing to bet that your rabbi could help you and your sons during this time of study and [...] 4137 51 16_Re: Kids in Shul7_R Segal20_segalfam@westnet.com29_Wed, 14 Aug 1996 01:21:33 GMT554_us-ascii Suzanna Hicks wrote: snip

> I am converting to Judaism but am very much in the initial phase. very > smart and very sensitive. After months of denial and real communication snip > Judaism we won't celebrate Christmas because ..... and as I got into the > don't believe in Jesus we'll go to Hell!! He's internalized precisely what > I'd like to think that what I'm experiencing is not so much confusion as it > is wrestling. As I told a rabbi friend recently, conversion is not for > wimps. Especially if you are a single mother of a [...] 4189 47 5_Oops!14_Hadass Eviatar26_eviatar@noether.ibd.nrc.ca29_Tue, 13 Aug 1996 14:10:43 GMT345_us-ascii I wrote:

> > Rafi is five months old, and cannot really make it through a full service, and > I'm sure this will only get worse as he gets older. What we've done so far is > to take turns taking him out. In a manner of speaking, he gets to davven during > Shacharit and I get to davven during Musaf, or something like that. [...] 4237 41 45_Re: Kashrut and the JCC (and my son) - A Vent10_Eric Simon23_erics@access2.digex.net29_Wed, 14 Aug 1996 15:34:51 GMT332_- Louise Miller (miller@louise.ucsd.edu) wrote: : Last Friday I went to pick my son up at the JCC camp, and he was : happily munching away at non-kosher doughtnuts, despite the repeated : assurances from the staff that he was being fed only kosher food. : (His lunch box full of healthy and kosher goodies sat untouched.) [sd] [...] 4279 20 37_Re: Really young children and shul...13_S Silverstein18_silverst@xs4all.nl29_Wed, 14 Aug 1996 08:06:06 GMT406_- In article <4ugv5g$jpk@chaos.dac.neu.edu>, mpeskin@lynx.dac.neu.edu (Marjorie Peskin) wrote:

>PS. Our shul is on the web, so do a search and check it out. :-)

Perhaps if you told us the name...? :)

* This post reflects the author's opinion; the moderators' opinions may differ. * Posters seeking medical or halachic information should consult competent * authorities in those fields. 4300 47 17_Re: Moral Dilemma12_naomi pardue30_npardue@ezinfo.ucs.indiana.edu29_Tue, 13 Aug 1996 16:18:09 GMT562_- Marjorie Peskin (mpeskin@lynx.dac.neu.edu) wrote:

> I belong to a Mother of Twins club that holds a twice yearly sale of > kids clothing, equipment, and toys. The sale has always been on a > Saturday. The sale consists of several parts, each with a set of > regulations. There are three shopping periods, one for people that work > the sale (first dibs on everything), one for people in the club that > aren't working the sale (second dibs, things picked over, good stuff > gone), and open to the public (still lots there, but picked over by the > [...] 4348 50 45_Re: Kashrut and the JCC (and my son) - A Vent8_Jane Fox18_JFOX@macc.wisc.edu29_Tue, 13 Aug 1996 13:50:41 GMT529_- I'd recommend not saying anything more to your son. He is too young to handle this and too young to be responsible for keeping kosher. But I would take it up with whoever runs the JCC and with the Federation that funds it and with every O and C rabbi in town. You might check the charter or formal priciples of the camp, the JCC, and the Federation and see if you can make a calm presentation, based on their own principles, of why a camp run by the JCC should probably encourage and certainly should not interfere with a [...] 4399 31 37_Re: Really young children and shul...0_30_Meredith_Warshaw@frankston.com29_Thu, 15 Aug 1996 15:51:00 GMT533_- S. Silverstein wrote: <, mpeskin@lynx.dac.neu.edu (Marjorie Peskin) wrote:

>PS. Our shul is on the web, so do a search and check it out. :-)

Perhaps if you told us the name...? :)>>

It's Temple Reyim, in Newton MA, and it's everything Marjorie says it is. When I brought my then-4 year old to Friday night services so I could say kaddish for my grandmother's yahrzeit and he got restless, the rabbi sat by us and started amusing him so I could pray uninterupted! [...] 4431 31 30_Really young children and shul15_Marjorie Peskin24_mpeskin@lynx.dac.neu.edu29_Thu, 15 Aug 1996 17:40:03 GMT463_US-ASCII

> > >PS. Our shul is on the web, so do a search and check it out. :-) > > Perhaps if you told us the name...? :)



But I did! Temple Reyim in Newton, MA.

http://web.mit.edu/afs/athena.mit.edu/user/m/a/maz/www/tr/index

Marjorie

* This post reflects the author's opinion; the moderators' opinions may differ. * Posters seeking medical or halachic information should consult competent * authorities in those fields. 4463 26 39_childrens' activities for Rosh Hashanah9_Anita Lee14_anitale@ns.net29_Fri, 16 Aug 1996 05:17:10 GMT377_us-ascii Somehow I have ended up in charge of organizing childrens' activities for the high holidays. Our temple offers a childrens' service and activities during the time the parents are in service.This means I have to keep around 200 5 to 12 year olds busy for around 3 hours. I also have practically no budget to do this with. I would welcome any suggestions or ideas. [...] 4490 38 37_Re: Really young children and shul...14_Laurel Halbany23_mythago@agora.rdrop.com29_Fri, 16 Aug 1996 00:34:45 GMT567_- mpeskin@lynx.dac.neu.edu (Marjorie Peskin) wrote:

>Rachelle J. Bienstock (rachelle@picard.niehs.nih.gov) wrote: >: Following the line of kids sitting in services...

>: What do people do with really small children? My daughter is >: 18 months old...it is almost impossible for her to sit still >: for any length of time, so as a result, one of us, my husband or I >: have had to watch our daughter and one of us can go to services. >: We can not even leave her in daycare if it is provided as she is even >: too little to be left with someone she [...] 4529 45 17_Re: Moral Dilemma14_Laurel Halbany23_mythago@agora.rdrop.com29_Fri, 16 Aug 1996 00:34:43 GMT579_- Marjorie Peskin wrote:

>This boils down to me being the troublemaker. Instead of trying to >accomodate me, they've been clear that they won't make any concessions >whatsoever, and I'm expected to work both days. I have been stewing over >this for a long time, and finally called my Rabbi to discuss it with >him. He called the president of the club, and she didn't budge. We have >tried to work out a solution that will work for me, but it requires >finding someone that will work for me on Saturday so I can go to >services. This may be [...] 4575 27 11_Re: Arielle9_Amy Green26_agreen@mail.bcpl.lib.md.us28_Tue, 6 Aug 1996 21:14:23 GMT492_- "Hadass Eviatar" wrote:

:I would add the double "l" and the "e" to make :sure it is pronounced properly (i.e., NOT like the Little Mermaid!). But the :double "r" has me stumped.

How is Ariel(le) pronounced?

Amy

-- Long Live the Duck



* This post reflects the author's opinion; the moderators' opinions may differ. * Posters seeking medical or halachic information should consult competent * authorities in those fields. 4603 74 28_Re: SCJ-PARENTING digest 28116_Richard Schachet20_lvrabbi@accessnv.com29_Sat, 10 Aug 1996 17:10:11 GMT539_-

The other day I went to a movie. Prior to the fature coming on a sign came on the screen: "Quiet is requested during the showing of this film. Please take noisy children outside to the lobby." Well the film went on, and I, the lucky one, had a talking young child behind me who constantly ruined the film for me. Finally I turned around and politely asked the mother to take her child outside so I could enjoy the film. she, of course, refused and the child continued. Complaints finally to the management also did no good. [...] 4678 41 15_A moral dilemma15_Gershom Barnard26_barnard@physung.phy.uc.edu29_Sun, 11 Aug 1996 18:31:55 GMT560_- I am sorry to have to disagree with the very principled position taken by Marjorie and Georgeanne about the Mothers-of-Twins group that requires people to work on Saturday in order to take full advantage of their savings. IMO, precisely because they are a privte organization, they can make whatever rules they want. If you cannot persuade them to accomodate you, then you are out of luck. Incidentally, unless there is reason to believe that they made the Saturday rule with the intention of excluding observant Jews, then they are *not* anti-Semitic. [...] 4720 57 28_Re: SCJ-PARENTING digest 27811_Leah Adezio16_sladezio@nac.net29_Thu, 15 Aug 1996 02:33:31 GMT496_-

> "Richard Schachet" writes:



> One of the major arguments we have had in our congregation (70% are > seniors) is regarding the conduct of children at services. We had > parents who stated when their children misbehaved, "That's the way > kids are." I say NO! That's the way ill behaved children are. As > Andrea's children sit at services, so did mine. They knew what was > expected of them because it started when they were very young. [...] 4778 66 16_Re: Kids in Shul14_Howard Gershen18_howard@boxhill.com29_Fri, 16 Aug 1996 16:29:48 GMT555_-

Suzanna Hicks wrote: snip

> I am converting to Judaism but am very much in the initial phase. very > smart and very sensitive. After months of denial and real communication snip > Judaism we won't celebrate Christmas because ..... and as I got into the > don't believe in Jesus we'll go to Hell!! He's internalized precisely what > I'd like to think that what I'm experiencing is not so much confusion as it > is wrestling. As I told a rabbi friend recently, conversion is not for > wimps. Especially if you are a single mother of a [...] 4845 50 34_Re: fund raising & nursery schools11_Kris Hasson19_hasson@teleport.com28_Sat, 3 Aug 1996 00:18:57 GMT473_- In article <960724173942_244862061@emout16.mail.aol.com>, LayneMurph@aol.com wrote: >My little boy attends a nursery school at a Jewish Community Center in a very >ethnically diverse section of Los Angeles. [snip] > As with all community based programs, >finances are always an issue and we all do our part to raise funds so that >the school can continue to function and offer scholarships. [snip about school fundraiser selling wrapping paper that was mostly Xmas] [...] 4896 53 28_Re: Kids Sitting in Services14_Laurel Halbany23_mythago@agora.rdrop.com29_Fri, 16 Aug 1996 00:34:40 GMT589_- "Andrea Herrera" wrote:

>b) I feel that too many parents in shul don't have expectations of >good behavior. They "assume" the child can't or won't sit still, be >involved, be interested. If we find ways to make them feel involved, >make the services interesting, take time to explain what is going on, >or study the service at home and what it means, then the children >will have a better *feel* of what is happening around them. Granted, >much of our shul services go over the heads of young children, but >that isn't the important issue for a child. It's [...] 4950 35 48_Details of Jewish neighborhood in Rockville, MD?14_Howard Gershen18_howard@boxhill.com29_Fri, 16 Aug 1996 15:47:39 GMT307_-

My wife and I are moving to Maryland, and about to put a bid on a house in Tilden Woods, in Rockville, relatively close to the Chas. E. Smith(?) Jewish Day School. She grew up in Silver Spring, but she's lived in NYC for over a decade so her memories of the area can use a little refreshing. [...] 4986 52 19_Re: A moral dilemma15_Georganne Burke19_nbcnet@inforamp.net29_Sun, 18 Aug 1996 01:36:23 GMT500_- In article <4ul8ur$hgb@babbage.ece.uc.edu>, barnard@physung.phy.uc.edu (Gershom Barnard) wrote: >I am sorry to have to disagree with the very principled position >taken by Marjorie and Georgeanne about the Mothers-of-Twins >group that requires people to work on Saturday in order to take >full advantage of their savings. IMO, precisely because they >are a privte organization, they can make whatever rules they >want. If you cannot persuade them to accomodate you, then you >are out of luck. [...] 5039 23 11_Fundraising10_Marc Davis15_mdavis@infi.net29_Fri, 16 Aug 1996 15:49:49 GMT325_us-ascii I am sorry to bring this up again, but when the list was discussing fundrasing events, I was on vacation and only saw a couple of ideas. Would it be possible to to have a concise list of these ideas reposted if no one minds too much, or please send me some ideas at: mdavis@infi.net thanks so much sharon davis [...] 5063 59 37_Re: Really young children and shul...11_Kris Hasson19_hasson@teleport.com29_Sat, 17 Aug 1996 13:51:14 GMT642_- In article <4v0fkc$j19@hermes.rdrop.com>, mythago@agora.rdrop.com (Laurel Halbany) wrote: >mpeskin@lynx.dac.neu.edu (Marjorie Peskin) wrote: > >>Rachelle J. Bienstock (rachelle@picard.niehs.nih.gov) wrote: >>: Following the line of kids sitting in services... > >>: What do people do with really small children? My daughter is >>: 18 months old.. snippett >>: We can not even leave her in daycare if it is provided as she is even >>: too little to be left with someone she doesn't know (she will just >>: cry and scream if left with an unknown babysitter). > >I have this same problem! The shul is more than happy to provide >daycare, [...] 5123 73 37_Re: Really young children and shul...14_Paul Hossfield27_PHossfield@news-e2b.gnn.com29_Sun, 18 Aug 1996 16:29:52 GMT636_us-ascii

In article <4v4i1e$fbf@nadine.teleport.com> Kris Hasson wrote:

>Okay, I am not sure how this will go over but I'm making the suggestion >anyway.

>Likewise I have heard of this at churches--for example, the >service is on loudspeakers in the daycare room. >The conflict I personally have with this is if the children > are allowed to carry on their behavior just because they >are not in the sanctuary, yet can hear the service, they are >still being disrespectful of the service. Yet, it would >allow the parents to exert some discipline (being in another >room, perhaps they would be more effective [...] 5197 39 24_Kids Sitting In Services8_Friedman13_lexf@epix.net29_Sun, 18 Aug 1996 03:19:40 GMT539_us-ascii Rachelle J. Bienstock (rachelle@picard.niehs.nih.gov) wrote: >: Following the line of kids sitting in services...

>: What do people do with really small children? My daughter is >: 18 months old...it is almost impossible for her to sit still >: for any length of time, so as a result, one of us, my husband or I >: have had to watch our daughter and one of us can go to services. >: We can not even leave her in daycare if it is provided as she is even >: too little to be left with someone she doesn't know (she will [...] 5237 44 37_Sunday School - Teaching Kindergarten14_Andrea Herrera15_andreah@utj.org29_Sun, 18 Aug 1996 06:43:01 GMT501_-

I had just decided to take on the responsibility of teaching one of our synagogue's Kindergarten classes. What I am looking for is ideas and suggestions. Has there been a project your child has particularly liked? Do you have any suggestions for crafts, stories, etc?

I have subbed at our school for a number of years, but this is the first time I am taking on a class of my own. We do have a principal as well as guidlelines that will be followed, but I would still like ideas. [...] 5282 64 24_Mothers of twins meeting10_Marc Davis15_mdavis@infi.net29_Sat, 17 Aug 1996 22:36:57 GMT399_US-ASCII I know this has nothing to do with group meetings, but it does have to do with things planned on Shabbat.

I am in Virginia Beach, and for some crazy reason we had five snow days this past year. The public schools were held responsible for making up these snow days and after much debate it was decided that the three days would be made up on Memorial Day, and on two Saturdays. [...] 5347 85 28_Re: SCJ-PARENTING digest 2780_17_meirman@erols.com29_Sun, 18 Aug 1996 19:42:26 GMT683_- In soc.culture.jewish.parenting on 16 Aug 1996 15:23:29 -0700 sladezio@nac.net (Leah Adezio) posted:



>> "Richard Schachet" writes:



>

>> When we are conducting services, there is a sense of timing and mood >> setting which as a Rabbi I try and do. It is difficult with ill >> behaved children.

>I would hope that you would be aware that there are some children, due to >neurological impairments such as Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, >Aspergers' Autism, and others that will have a difficult time sitting through >services no matter the parents' best attempts to raise well-behaved >children. [...] 5433 31 23_Alef Bet Cookie Cutters13_Louise Miller22_miller@louise.ucsd.edu29_Mon, 19 Aug 1996 18:37:31 GMT338_us-ascii I'd like to make alef bet cookies for my son's 3rd birthday party in October. Has anyone ever seen alef bet cookie cutters like the ABC cookie cutters some of the educational toy stores sell?

(Anyone in Brooklyn NY, my husband is there this week, so if you know of a store in NY that has them, pls e-mail me ASAP!!!) [...] 5465 87 28_Re: SCJ-PARENTING digest 28111_Kris Hasson19_hasson@teleport.com29_Sat, 17 Aug 1996 14:16:13 GMT397_- In article <199608101611.JAA26605@bighorn.accessnv.com>, lvrabbi@accessnv.com wrote: > >The other day I went to a movie. Prior to the fature coming on a >sign came on the screen: "Quiet is requested during the showing of >this film. Please take noisy children outside to the lobby." Well

Right, and as I suggested in another post, why not have a crying room (as some theaters have). [...] 5553 47 13_Kids and Shul0_17_David2505@aol.com29_Mon, 19 Aug 1996 03:44:05 GMT547_-

I have a couple of thoughts on this as well.

First, find a kid friendly shul. If you are in a shul where decorum is more important than full participation (by kids or anyone), you just can't do it. My kids are 5 yrs, 3 yrs and 10 weeks. The older kids do spend most of their time in babysitting on Shabbat morning (evening services are just not possible, because they are too close to the bewitching hour). However, they do spend at least some time in the service most weeks, and next year the older one will transition into [...] 5601 52 7_Arielle14_Hadass Eviatar26_eviatar@noether.ibd.nrc.ca29_Mon, 19 Aug 1996 19:28:29 GMT291_us-ascii Amy Green wrote: > > "Hadass Eviatar" wrote: > > :I would add the double "l" and the "e" to make > :sure it is pronounced properly (i.e., NOT like the Little Mermaid!). But the > :double "r" has me stumped. > > How is Ariel(le) pronounced? > > Amy [...] 5654 24 14_Third Birthday14_Robyn Kozierok26_robyn@rice-chex.ai.mit.edu29_Mon, 19 Aug 1996 21:03:28 GMT475_- Hi,

I have seen hints here that a child's 3rd birthday is of special religious significance, but I don't know any details. Since my son is about to turn three, I wonder if anyone here can clue me in.

Thanks, --Robyn (mommy to Ryan 9/7/93 and Matthew 6/16/96)



* This post reflects the author's opinion; the moderators' opinions may differ. * Posters seeking medical or halachic information should consult competent * authorities in those fields. 5679 60 28_Re: SCJ-PARENTING digest 28910_Marc Davis15_mdavis@infi.net29_Tue, 20 Aug 1996 05:06:55 GMT302_US-ASCII

> > > I had just decided to take on the responsibility of teaching one of > our synagogue's Kindergarten classes. What I am looking for is ideas > and suggestions. Has there been a project your child has particularly > liked? Do you have any suggestions for crafts, stories, etc? [...] 5740 31 17_aleph bet cookies25_Chana Lajcher JCT Library25_lajcher@brachot.jct.ac.il29_Tue, 20 Aug 1996 09:23:07 GMT444_US-ASCII Not quite the same thing, but you might try painting letters on with egg mixed with food dye and letter stencils. I saw that in a cookbook once but I admit I've never tried it.

Another idea, I saw chocolate molds in Boro Park (try G and Sons). They are much smaller than cookies but molding chocolate is really easy. (microwave or double boil the chocolate, pour into molds, cool in freezer until just hard then take out). [...] 5772 17 28_Re: New Yeshiva in Torontois10_AGoldb910518_agoldb9105@aol.com29_Mon, 19 Aug 1996 23:07:04 GMT272_- is this new yeshivah affiliated with any group or coomunity if yes which one?

* This post reflects the author's opinion; the moderators' opinions may differ. * Posters seeking medical or halachic information should consult competent * authorities in those fields. 5790 45 18_Re: Third Birthday0_16_Elizcat1@aol.com29_Wed, 21 Aug 1996 05:35:36 GMT525_-

There is a great deal of significance to the 3rd birthday of a boy. One of the major events that occur for some Orthodox who hold with this tradition is a Upsharin, which is the first haircut the child will have. There is much mysticism and rich tradition as to why the hair is not cut...one of the reasons has to do with the same way that in Israel, the first three years of fruits off a tree are not used either. They go back to the ground from which they came. Cutting the child's hair is symbolic of fully [...] 5836 66 42_Re: Blessing for girls and Shabbat manuals11_JX and Soph16_sophjxl@dnai.com29_Tue, 23 Jul 1996 09:26:42 GMT381_- David Karr wrote:

> > And while we're on the general topic of Shabbat manuals, does any of > them give the correct Hebrew text of the blessing for girls? I know > enough Hebrew to recognize that the blessing I copied from one book > is for boys, but not enough to confidently "fix" the gender. > (It seems silly to give a boy's blessing when we have only girls.) > > [...] 5903 32 12_tot shabbats0_16_JRomjrom@aol.com29_Wed, 21 Aug 1996 02:23:52 GMT323_-

When my kids were in nursery school we took them to family services friday night. They were well planned, based on songs the kids learned at the school. they also included dancing (v'shomrei? something like that) that would start slow, get faster, and then wind down again. it helped alleviate the wigglies. [...] 5936 33 28_Re: SCJ-PARENTING digest 2910_16_Elizcat1@aol.com29_Thu, 22 Aug 1996 05:14:05 GMT424_-



In a message dated 8/22/96 12:10:46 AM, you wrote:

<>

Actually, this is quite biblical--these are the names of the Matriarchs of the Jewish people, all rightoeus women worthy of great praise! [...] 5970 42 15_Re: arts/crafts7_R Segal20_segalfam@westnet.com29_Thu, 22 Aug 1996 07:00:34 GMT536_us-ascii K Goldman wrote:

> |> I'm wondering if anyone can give some suggestions regarding arts and > |> crafts. As k'tanim director I am always searching for ideas, especially > |> with a Jewish flavor. I try to have a craft consistent with the weekly > |> Parsha, whenever possible. I'm not creative in the area of arts and > |> crafts but can at least copy other's ideas :) One of my challenges is > |> that the age span of the children in the program range from newly > |> turned 3 year olds through third grade. Thanks [...] 6013 50 28_Re: Mothers of twins meeting21_Rachelle J. Bienstock29_rachelle@picard.niehs.nih.gov29_Thu, 22 Aug 1996 13:51:29 GMT572_us-ascii Jews are a very small minority in this "Christian" country and it makes it very difficult when it comes to certain things like this "mothers of twins meetings" etcetera. We had the same thing here last year when the first day of public school was scheduled for Rosh Hashanah. Sometimes, because we are such a small minority, particularly in some parts of the country, it is felt by the majority that not every small group can be accomodated. I think the important thing is that (1) All Jews stick together- this is a problem sometimes. When I lived in Texas [...] 6064 31 18_Re: Third Birthday14_Jan Silbermann16_js@cs.tulane.edu29_Fri, 23 Aug 1996 01:58:24 GMT381_- In article <960821013536_184054130@emout10.mail.aol.com>, wrote: > >There is a great deal of significance to the 3rd birthday of a boy. One >of the major events that occur for some Orthodox who hold with this >tradition is a Upsharin, which is the first haircut the child will have.

This is also the time the little boy gets his payos (sidelocks). [...] 6096 56 19_Re: A moral dilemma0_17_meirman@erols.com29_Wed, 21 Aug 1996 20:18:43 GMT667_- In soc.culture.jewish.parenting on 16 Aug 1996 15:23:57 -0700 barnard@physung.phy.uc.edu (Gershom Barnard) posted:

>I am sorry to have to disagree with the very principled position >taken by Marjorie and Georgeanne about the Mothers-of-Twins >group that requires people to work on Saturday in order to take >full advantage of their savings. IMO, precisely because they >are a privte organization, they can make whatever rules they >want. If you cannot persuade them to accomodate you, then you >are out of luck. Incidentally, unless there is reason to >believe that they made the Saturday rule with the intention >of excluding observant Jews, then they [...] 6153 85 13_Jews in Texas14_Andrea Herrera15_andreah@utj.org29_Fri, 23 Aug 1996 06:13:28 GMT561_-

> From: "Rachelle J. Bienstock"

> When I lived in Texas (although I didn't have children), a > friend of mine was having difficulty because her daughter took off both > days for Rosh Hashanah from school, while the other Jewish children in > the class only took off the first day. The teacher couldn't understand > how all the other Jewish children could take off only 1 day, but this 1 > Jewish child had to take off 2. By not presenting a united front it > makes it more difficult. (2) Unite with others- [...] 6239 46 41_Re: Sunday School - Teaching Kindergarten7_R Segal20_segalfam@westnet.com29_Thu, 22 Aug 1996 06:53:10 GMT314_us-ascii Andrea Herrera wrote: > > I had just decided to take on the responsibility of teaching one of > our synagogue's Kindergarten classes. What I am looking for is ideas > and suggestions. Has there been a project your child has particularly > liked? Do you have any suggestions for crafts, stories, etc? [...] 6286 48 18_Re: Third Birthday13_Louise Miller22_miller@louise.ucsd.edu29_Tue, 20 Aug 1996 23:22:37 GMT316_us-ascii robyn@rice-chex.ai.mit.edu (Robyn Kozierok) wrote: >I have seen hints here that a child's 3rd birthday is of special religious >significance, but I don't know any details. Since my son is about to turn >three, I wonder if anyone here can clue me in. >

I'll start, and everyone else can jump in. [...] 6335 62 41_Re: Sunday School - Teaching Kindergarten14_Paul Hossfield27_PHossfield@news-e2c.gnn.com29_Wed, 21 Aug 1996 22:53:52 GMT367_us-ascii

In article <199608181146.GAA12879@oak.zilker.net> Andrea Herrera wrote: >I had just decided to take on the responsibility of teaching one of >our synagogue's Kindergarten classes. What I am looking for is ideas >and suggestions. Has there been a project your child has particularly >liked? Do you have any suggestions for crafts, stories, etc?. [...] 6398 55 28_Re: SCJ-PARENTING digest 29111_JX and Soph16_sophjxl@dnai.com29_Sat, 24 Aug 1996 01:24:24 GMT501_- In article <960822011404_462634471@emout09.mail.aol.com>, Elizcat1@aol.com wrote:

> In a message dated 8/22/96 12:10:46 AM, you wrote: > > < This isn't biblical. Our sages just felt that these were four pious women > who'd be good role models for our daughters. > >> > > Actually, this is quite biblical--these are the names of the Matriarchs of > the Jewish people, all rightoeus women worthy of great praise! [...] 6454 30 35_CTTD: A new style in kippah wearing11_JX and Soph16_sophjxl@dnai.com29_Sat, 24 Aug 1996 01:38:21 GMT525_- Just had to share this. The other day my son decided to wear his English muffin on his head as a kippah. He was all smiles and very proud of himself. Unfortunately, he, um, got it butter-side-down.

On two related threads. I went shopping a few weeks ago for a kippah for my friend's son's bris. I managed to find a leather one that was just the right size with strings attached to tie it on. I had never seen a leather one that little and it was quite propitious since that was the style my friend had asked me [...] 6485 36 28_Re: Mothers of twins meeting15_Claire Petersky25_petersky@coho.halcyon.com29_Sat, 24 Aug 1996 04:47:18 GMT527_- Rachelle J. Bienstock (rachelle@picard.niehs.nih.gov) wrote:

: When I lived in Texas (although I didn't have children), a : friend of mine was having difficulty because her daughter took off both : days for Rosh Hashanah from school, while the other Jewish children in : the class only took off the first day. The teacher couldn't understand : how all the other Jewish children could take off only 1 day, but this 1 : Jewish child had to take off 2. By not presenting a united front it : makes it more difficult. [...] 6522 38 30_Sitting through services & ADD9_Dana Lear23_d.lear@cchs.usyd.edu.au29_Sun, 25 Aug 1996 07:26:04 GMT534_us-ascii I stopped going to services when my son turned 18 months or so, but Max, now 8, has been going to Sunday school since February. I'd like to take him to Kol Nidre and the family services for Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur. So far we haven't had much luck in Friday night family services, which mostly end with hissed threats from me and pouting and sulking from Max. The temple is only offering High Holiday child care for 2-5 year olds, but I want him to be in the services, anyway. Any advice for the (single) parent of a [...] 6561 58 12_Crying Rooms18_Bissell Tina Irene18_tbissell@umich.edu29_Mon, 26 Aug 1996 13:20:37 GMT599_US-ASCII





On Sat, 17 Aug 1996, Kris Hasson wrote: > > >>Rachelle J. Bienstock (rachelle@picard.niehs.nih.gov) wrote:> > Some movie theaters have a "crying room" where babies and small children can > be (with their parents). There is a glass wall so the parents can watch the > movie and the sound is piped in. > > Likewise I have heard of this at churches--for example, the service is on > loudspeakers in the daycare room. > > Has anyone tried this? What do people think? I am especially interested > because my congregation is in the process of designing our space--we [...] 6620 29 33_High Holiday Children's Material?14_Marc Manheimer19_mamanhe@wam.umd.edu29_Sun, 25 Aug 1996 19:31:24 GMT325_us-ascii At my (Conservative) synagogue on the High Holidays we divide the children into three age groups. The older children (grade four and up) have a religious service of sorts. First through third graders are exposed to little more than glorified baby sitting. The youngest children have (mamash) baby sitting only. [...] 6650 66 28_Re: Mothers of twins meeting0_17_meirman@erols.com29_Mon, 26 Aug 1996 15:14:56 GMT432_- (*Moderator's Note: I want to remind posters to keep posts relevant to raising children in a Jewish context. We want to avoid getting into discussing the merits of Christianity here on our list. Any further discussion of this type may be refered to another more appropriate list. Thank you.)

In soc.culture.jewish.parenting on 22 Aug 1996 09:56:44 -0700 "Rachelle J. Bienstock" posted: [...] 6717 30 43_Re: childrens' activities for Rosh Hashanah0_21_moshes@vms.huji.ac.il29_Tue, 27 Aug 1996 14:16:47 GMT528_- Anita Lee writes: > Somehow I have ended up in charge of organizing childrens' > activities for the high holidays. Our temple offers a > childrens' service and activities during the time the > parents are in service.This means I have to keep around 200 > 5 to 12 year olds busy for around 3 hours. I also have > practically no budget to do this with. I would welcome any > suggestions or ideas. > Anita, Sorry I have no ideas but let me say "Kinainehora" - 200 youngsters sounds like a lot. Kol haKavod! [...] 6748 29 34_Re: Sitting through services & ADD10_I. Pour-El18_pourel@iastate.edu29_Tue, 27 Aug 1996 15:58:37 GMT177_-

>want him to be in the services, anyway. Any advice for the (single) parent >of a kid with attention deficit disorder? > Have you tried bribes?





6778 63 28_Re: Mothers of twins meeting10_David Karr13_dkarr@bbn.com29_Wed, 28 Aug 1996 16:55:16 GMT546_- In article <4vpqpv$ija@news6.erols.com> meirman@erols.com writes: >(*Moderator's Note: I want to remind posters to keep posts relevant >to raising children in a Jewish context. We want to avoid getting >into discussing the merits of Christianity here on our list. [...]

Point taken, but surely we can observe that there *are* differences between the practices of one Christian and another, and use this to illustrate the fact that it's not valid to ask one Jew what's OK and use that as the standard of behavior for all other Jews. [...] 6842 72 28_Re: SCJ-PARENTING digest 29019_Ilene S. Van Houter25_bk375@FreeNet.Buffalo.EDU29_Fri, 30 Aug 1996 02:05:12 GMT541_US-ASCII

> > > > I had just decided to take on the responsibility of teaching one of > > our synagogue's Kindergarten classes. What I am looking for is ideas > > and suggestions. Has there been a project your child has particularly > > liked? Do you have any suggestions for crafts, stories, etc? > > > OK Andrea, hope this helps: > 1.Plaster of paris fridge magnets using molds (messy but fun) > 2.Wooden mezzuahs, painted > 3. sponge paintings with precut sponges > 4. pop up books > 5. challah covers > 6. afikomen bags > 7. [...] 6915 34 8_Yahrzeit9_Mary Doty20_MLDOTY@MAIL.UNMC.EDU29_Fri, 30 Aug 1996 17:03:06 GMT325_- The Yahrzeit (anniversary of the death) of our first son, Dale, is rapidly approaching, September 6. Does anyone have any ideas that would make his Yahrzeit meaningful for our other two children. Dale died from Sudden Infant Death Syndrome before Rebecca and David were born. Right now, Becky is 3 and David is 1-1/2. [...] 6950 53 31_Re: Rosh Hashana Holidays, etc.16_Richard Schachet20_lvrabbi@accessnv.com29_Tue, 27 Aug 1996 15:34:22 GMT567_-

In response to those who have children that take two days off for Rosh Hashanah as well as the other holidays, I make it a practice to send a letter to every principal in the community (about 18 schools) reminding them that the holidays are coming, that some students and faculty might be out for one day, others for two and requesting that major homework assignments, new work or school functions are not held on these days. i.e. This year, R.H. falls on a Friday night--- Big football night -- We are requesting that all games be changed to Thursday [...] 7004 37 24_Inlaws for holiday's????9_E Bernard35_p014083b@pbfreenet.seflin.lib.fl.us29_Wed, 28 Aug 1996 14:33:12 GMT451_- My mother in law has retired with her second husband and has moved within 7 miles of our home.

It all sounds great but this lady has social appointments scheduled constantly, tennis, massage, bridge and so on. There has not been any time allocated for our 10 year old twins, they didn't even ask to watch the grandchildren for one day during the summer. My husband stopped working to spend the summer with them. NO MONEY in this summer. [...] 7042 52 41_Re: Sunday School - Teaching Kindergarten5_Shari15_sfr2@hooked.net29_Wed, 28 Aug 1996 01:06:49 GMT329_us-ascii At 06:43 AM 8/18/96 GMT, Andrea wrote: > >I had just decided to take on the responsibility of teaching one of >our synagogue's Kindergarten classes. What I am looking for is ideas >and suggestions. Has there been a project your child has particularly >liked? Do you have any suggestions for crafts, stories, etc? > [...] 7095 52 49_Sticking together (was: Mothers of twins meeting)5_Shari15_sfr2@hooked.net29_Wed, 28 Aug 1996 01:06:52 GMT612_us-ascii At 01:51 PM 8/22/96 GMT, "Rachelle J. Bienstock" wrote:

I think the >important thing is that (1) All Jews stick together- this is a problem >sometimes. When I lived in Texas (although I didn't have children), a >friend of mine was having difficulty because her daughter took off both >days for Rosh Hashanah from school, while the other Jewish children in >the class only took off the first day. The teacher couldn't understand >how all the other Jewish children could take off only 1 day, but this 1 >Jewish child had to take off 2. By not presenting [...] 7148 59 11_Baby kippot14_Hadass Eviatar26_eviatar@noether.ibd.nrc.ca29_Tue, 27 Aug 1996 14:34:16 GMT372_us-ascii Sophie wrote: > > Just had to share this. The other day my son decided to wear his English > muffin on his head as a kippah. He was all smiles and very proud of > himself. Unfortunately, he, um, got it butter-side-down.

Cute! I'm looking forward to Rafi doing that kind of thing; at the moment he is limited to smearing squash and cereal on his face. [...] 7208 41 19_Twins Club followup15_Marjorie Peskin24_mpeskin@lynx.dac.neu.edu29_Tue, 27 Aug 1996 17:22:02 GMT528_US-ASCII Since my original post, several people have made the assumption that the club does not have to change its policies to suit my needs. I'd like to mention that this is untrue. This is a tax-exempt club, and as such, discrimination is against the law. The national officers of the Mother of Twins club have been very helpful, and they KNOW that their tax-exempt status is at stake. If I can prove discrimination, they will not be able to continue as a non-profit organization, so this is of great importance to them. [...] 7250 28 42_Nursing in Synagogue, was Re: Crying Rooms14_Robyn Kozierok16_robyn@ai.mit.edu29_Thu, 29 Aug 1996 21:39:23 GMT543_- In article , Bissell Tina Irene wrote: >I've notices some women use the space [crying room] for nursing too.

Is there a religious problem with nursing in synagogue, if the mom is reasonably discreet and the baby is reasonably quite. I'd be particularly interested in the Conservative perspective, which is where we attend services. (It seems like it might be a more difficult question there than in Orthodox, where the women sit separately.) [...]