1 SHAMASH.ORG /usr/www/wwwhc/listserv/archives/scj-parenting April 2003 2 60 59_[SCJ-PARENTING:7056] New Article: Spirituality and Preteens6_Jfer P17_J3fer@hotmail.com29_Mon, 14 Apr 2003 10:52:11 EDT687_-

In case anybody's interested, here's a short article I've written about this often-overlooked age group: http://preteenagerstoday.com/resources/articles/spirituality.htm

The message of the article is basically the same as my posts here: "it's never too early to start...but it's probably not be too late either." The article includes helpful comments from NCSY's Rabbi Glenn Black, as well as a Christian teacher; we're not the only ones trying to keep our preteens involved (I had a Muslim perspective also, until I found out he was active in the Muslim Students' Association of Concordia University, which is working unceasingly to make every Jewish student feel [...] 63 43 30_[SCJ-PARENTING:7057] The Kippa24_Knut KlavenessHeidelberg24_heidelberg@operamail.com29_Mon, 14 Apr 2003 10:59:29 EDT98_- Just wonder what to do when children refuse to wear the Kippa or cover the head?



107 70 34_[SCJ-PARENTING:7058] Re: The Kippa6_Jfer P17_J3fer@hotmail.com29_Mon, 14 Apr 2003 21:27:56 EDT474_- Knut:

There have been a few discussions about this issue here over the years. Maybe (HINT HINT?) it should be added to the FAQ if it's not in there already.

In the meantime, here's a link to one discussion a long time ago: http://groups.google.ca/groups?th=f110bbe249170595

And another post I contributed a couple of years ago about how I eventually solved my son's problem: http://groups.google.ca/groups?selm=998484273scjp-submit%40shamash.org [...] 178 63 34_[SCJ-PARENTING:7059] Re: The Kippa24_Knut KlavenessHeidelberg24_heidelberg@operamail.com29_Tue, 15 Apr 2003 10:17:39 EDT610_- On Tue, 15 Apr 2003 01:23:07 -0000, J3fer@hotmail.com (Jfer P) wrote:



OK, thank you for the answer and the links. I am new to the group and will take a look at the old discussion.

Best wishes from Knut



>Knut: > >There have been a few discussions about this issue here over the >years. Maybe (HINT HINT?) it should be added to the FAQ if it's not >in there already. > >In the meantime, here's a link to one discussion a long time ago: >http://groups.google.ca/groups?th=f110bbe249170595 > >And another post I contributed a couple of years ago about how I >eventually [...] 242 101 48_[SCJ-PARENTING:7060] New: The Jewish Trivia Quiz13_Jacob Richman17_jrichman@jr.co.il29_Tue, 15 Apr 2003 10:24:13 EDT476_- Hi Everyone!

The Jewish Trivia Quiz is a new online Flash game that is now available on The J Site at: http://www.j.co.il

This new Flash educational game is connected to the Jewish Trivia Database that contains over 600 questions and answers on the following topics: Passover, Israel, Jerusalem, Sports, Entertainment in addition to others. Here is a selection of questions that may randomly come up in a selected quiz: [...] 344 43 29_[SCJ-PARENTING:7061] question9_Christine23_christinejanzen@shaw.ca29_Thu, 17 Apr 2003 09:45:50 EDT473_- I have a 5 year old son who's father is Jewish and I am not. His father is not in his life and hasn't been since he was a baby. I would like for my son to know about Jewish culture and religion because that is who his father is but it's hard for me to teach him anything since I really don't know/remember a whole lot. Ideally I would talk to a rabbi but there is only one in the city I live in and he happens to know my son's father and his family quite well and I [...] 388 66 33_[SCJ-PARENTING:7062] Re: question24_Knut KlavenessHeidelberg24_heidelberg@operamail.com29_Thu, 17 Apr 2003 15:05:41 EDT517_- On Thu, 17 Apr 2003 13:40:31 -0000, Christine wrote:

>I have a 5 year old son who's father is Jewish and I am not. His father is >not in his life and hasn't been since he was a baby. I would like for my >son to know about Jewish culture and religion because that is who his father >is but it's hard for me to teach him anything since I really don't >know/remember a whole lot. Ideally I would talk to a rabbi but there is >only one in the city I live in and he happens to know [...] 455 73 50_[SCJ-PARENTING:7064] Re: SCJ-PARENTING digest 173717_Daniel S. Schultz18_danschul@umich.edu29_Fri, 18 Apr 2003 11:55:23 EDT531_- Hi Christine,

I'm impressed by your desire to enrich your son's life. I am a divorced Jewish father of two boys (now 8 and 10). I worked hard to get 50-50 custody and parenting of them. I would like to propose an idea for you to consider. Instead of you teaching your son about Judaism, let his father do it. You write that his father is out of his life. Most divorced fathers that I've met who are not in their child's life want to be involved and are kept out by child's mother. I've met divorced mothers who swear [...] 529 127 50_[SCJ-PARENTING:7065] Re: SCJ-PARENTING digest 17379_Christine23_christinejanzen@shaw.ca29_Sat, 19 Apr 2003 23:31:05 EDT609_- **************************************** MODERATOR'S NOTE: This is being permitted as a follow-up by the original poster. However, further posts should ensure that they pertain to Jewish parenting aspects of this poster's situation. ****************************************

Hi Daniel,

If it were possible for my son to be tought these things by his father I would be thrilled. However, it has been his choice to stay out of our lives. We were never married and my son was born when I was 16 and he was 18 and he was in and out for a couple of years and then he finally chose to stay out. [...] 657 196 50_[SCJ-PARENTING:7067] Re: SCJ-PARENTING digest 173716_Barry Dov Lerner21_bdlerner1@comcast.net29_Sun, 20 Apr 2003 14:18:25 EDT571_- Dear Christine,

Your situation calls for a caring response, if only because you care so much for your son. I hope and pray that your son comes to understand how much you wanted for him to know something about the Jewish tradition.

The Jewish community is divided currently on how Jewish law is interpreted in terms of Jewish identity. Based upon your brief statement, it would appear that you are not Jewish and that your son is being raised in your religious faith community. If that is the case, since his mother is not Jewish and he may have also [...] 854 48 49_[SCJ-PARENTING:7068] Split families advice please0_41_"Elizabeth Edwards-Longhurst"@SHAMASH.ORG29_Mon, 21 Apr 2003 06:18:56 EDT528_- I would really like some advice please. I am a divorced mother of two young boys and with a wonderful new partner I am planning a great new future with. My partner is Jewish and I wish to convert, my ex-husband wasn't. Of course when I convert I will wish to have my boys do so also. I am concerned though and wondered if other people have experience of this situation..... can my ex-husband make things difficult for us to convert. Is there anyway he can make it difficult or impossible for the boys to convert with me. [...] 903 98 33_[SCJ-PARENTING:7069] Re: question14_Betsy Schwartz22_betsys@gsd.hahvahd.edu29_Mon, 21 Apr 2003 09:02:11 EDT351_-

Hi Christine,

Jewish culture is very centered around group activities, celebrations in

the home, and being part of a community. You can find reading=20 suggestions, but the best way to get introduced to Jewish Culture and=20 religion is basically to find some Jews to hang out with and share some=20 celebrations wtih.=20 [...] 1002 48 53_[SCJ-PARENTING:7071] Re: Split families advice please15_Hillary Israeli19_hillary@hillary.net29_Mon, 21 Apr 2003 21:23:58 EDT644_- In , Elizabeth Edwards-Longhurst wrote:

*I would really like some advice please. I am a divorced mother of two young *boys and with a wonderful new partner I am planning a great new future with. *My partner is Jewish and I wish to convert, my ex-husband wasn't. Of course *when I convert I will wish to have my boys do so also. I am concerned though *and wondered if other people have experience of this situation..... can my *ex-husband make things difficult for us to convert. Is there anyway he can *make it difficult or impossible for the boys [...] 1051 74 30_[SCJ-PARENTING:7072] resources0_15_BKadden@aol.com29_Mon, 21 Apr 2003 21:24:02 EDT491_-

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Dear Christine,

I am including two online resources for you. The first is The Jewish Parent Page, I write this newsletter for the UAHC (Reform movement). http://uahc.org/educate/parent/

The other is for Interfaith Family, this has lots of information but it does have a bias which is to encourage Jewish choices for families of interfaith. [...] 1126 81 53_[SCJ-PARENTING:7073] Re: Split families advice please15_Fred Rosenblatt15_fredr5@juno.com29_Tue, 22 Apr 2003 12:09:20 EDT674_- hillary@hillary.net (Hillary Israeli) wrote in message news:... > In , Elizabeth Edwards-Longhurst > wrote: > > *I would really like some advice please. I am a divorced mother of two young > *boys and with a wonderful new partner I am planning a great new future with. > *My partner is Jewish and I wish to convert, my ex-husband wasn't. Of course > *when I convert I will wish to have my boys do so also. I am concerned though > *and wondered if other people have experience of this situation..... can my > *ex-husband make things difficult for [...] 1208 301 50_[SCJ-PARENTING:7075] Re: SCJ-PARENTING digest 174116_Barry Dov Lerner21_bdlerner1@comcast.net29_Tue, 22 Apr 2003 13:08:47 EDT619_- Dear Friends,

Over the year, we see requests for resources. With the permission of the Jewish National Fund, I've reprinted a book that is out of date for the Festival of Shavuot/Pentecost of stories for children of various ages. In addition ther is study material for the adults.

Still FREE and available at www.jewishfreeware.org. BTW although we hoped for 30,000 downloads of the Passover materials, we had over 65,000, from more than 40 countries, from every continent except Anarctica - what a rush and all in four weeks!! It proves that there are people on line - Jewish families, dual-faith [...] 1510 51 49_[SCJ-PARENTING:7076] Split families advice please15_Irene Bleiweiss23_Irene.Bleiweiss@fcc.gov29_Wed, 23 Apr 2003 16:32:13 EDT408_- I'd like to expand on a point that others have touched upon.

Your circumstances may involve issues both of Jewish law (ask a rabbi) and of secular law (ask a lawyer). The exact issues will be shaped by the level of Jewish observance that you and the boys aspire to achieve through the conversion. So, answering that question, along with your partner, may be a good place to start your journey. [...] 1562 68 34_[SCJ-PARENTING:7077] Re: The Kippa6_Robert31_judaismfaqs@yahoo.com.spammenot29_Fri, 25 Apr 2003 14:16:42 EDT389_- "Knut KlavenessHeidelberg" : > Just wonder what to do when children refuse to wear the Kippa or cover > the head?

Be glad that this is the worst of your problems, and that this is the worst of their rebellion! From my own experiences as a teacher, I have seen a lot worse. (Tattoos, drinking alcohol, drug use/abuse, total rejection of their religion, pre-marital sex, etc.) [...] 1631 51 49_[SCJ-PARENTING:7078] Split families advice please15_Irene Bleiweiss23_Irene.Bleiweiss@fcc.gov29_Sat, 26 Apr 2003 13:16:47 EDT408_- I'd like to expand on a point that others have touched upon.

Your circumstances may involve issues both of Jewish law (ask a rabbi) and of secular law (ask a lawyer). The exact issues will be shaped by the level of Jewish observance that you and the boys aspire to achieve through the conversion. So, answering that question, along with your partner, may be a good place to start your journey. [...] 1683 51 53_[SCJ-PARENTING:7079] Re: Split families advice please17_Marion Baumgarten23_marion10@mindspring.com29_Sun, 27 Apr 2003 22:38:11 EDT506_-

> > *I would really like some advice please. I am a divorced mother of two > > *young boys and with a wonderful new partner I am planning a great new > > *future with. My partner is Jewish and I wish to convert, my ex-husband > > *wasn't. Of course when I convert I will wish to have my boys do so > > *also. I am concerned though and wondered if other people have > > *experience of this situation..... can my ex-husband make things > > *difficult for us to convert. Is there anyway he can [...] 1735 61 53_[SCJ-PARENTING:7080] Re: Split families advice please9_Elizabeth44_elizabeth@edwards-longhurst.fsbusiness.co.uk29_Mon, 28 Apr 2003 17:12:32 EDT583_- Thank you for your concern however my ex husband is not Christian or religious in any way at all. I have recently spoken to him and I think things may turn out fine with the boys. Of course only time will tell.

Elizabeth

"Marion Baumgarten" wrote in message news:1fttrkz.1bkfv2la7360iN%marion10@mindspring.com... > > > > *I would really like some advice please. I am a divorced mother of two > > > *young boys and with a wonderful new partner I am planning a great new > > > *future with. My partner is Jewish and I wish to convert, my [...] 1797 80 33_[SCJ-PARENTING:7081] Re: question6_Jfer P17_J3fer@hotmail.com29_Tue, 29 Apr 2003 05:45:25 EDT327_- Christine wrote (some time ago!): > I have a 5 year old son who's father is Jewish and I am not. His father is > not in his life and hasn't been since he was a baby. I would like for my > son to know about Jewish culture and religion because that is who his father > is but it's hard for me... [...] 1878 73 53_[SCJ-PARENTING:7082] Re: Split families advice please6_Jfer P17_J3fer@hotmail.com29_Wed, 30 Apr 2003 15:19:46 EDT337_- Elizabeth wrote (some time ago): > I would really like some advice please. I am a divorced mother of two > young boys and with a wonderful new partner I am planning a great new > future with. My partner is Jewish and I wish to convert, my ex-husband > wasn't. Of course when I convert I will wish to have my boys do so > also.... [...]